It took a little while to place the how and why, but here it is: Hell. Not the physical location you baboon, Albuquerque is actually a quite nice locale, but the situation an sich point toward one inevitable conclusion. I am stuck in an elegantly designed dimension of torment and high gas prices. I can live with the torment, because that is an inescapable notch in the con column of the human condition; the high gas prices I could do without...
Other "events" have led me to this conclusion. Take the 8 ball I purchased recently from a traveling gypsy outside of my apartment one day:
Yep. That's depressing alright. Thank you Katrineski Romanoski (if that is your real name), for the wonderful fucking demonic merchanise. ...vodka drinking bitch.
That's not it, though! Oh, no no no no no. If you thought that was it, then you thought WRONG!!!!!
There's my left hand. I can't feel it anymore. Well, the two fingers farthest away from my thumb anyhow. About 2 weeks ago, they went numb, and today they started spazing out. Sometime during the night, they drew on themselves. Probably with the assistance of my copious amounts of arm hair...which I never trusted from day one, just for the record.
Seriously Folks, this is no joke. I am stuck in hell. Not Karmic hell, not the good 'ol "C of E" or "C of I" hell either. This is a full blown case of, as a good friend of mine used to say "the screaming existential-shit fits".
Okay, maybe no one i know says something like that, but I wish they had because they'd be pretty bad-ass and deserving of being known by me.
(Also, someone poured a bottle of milk on my car a while ago because she hated me (long story), and i never cleaned it off, and it stank for like a month. I returned it to the rental place not too long ago, and they all gave me this weird look for bringing back a car covered in curlded milk. Like it was my idea to give the car a lactose-based paintjob or something. Assholes.)
