I'm not sure my life has meaning anymore.
-RaiNny
Saturday, September 30, 2006
5:31 PM - After seeing something like this...
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
10:30 PM - Song about me!!!!!
Friday, September 22, 2006
7:26 PM - HK_Newbie's Grandmammy
While out here in Washington state (more on this later), i've had the opportunity to visit family. For those of you who know none of my family-- or have only met the few of them in Pa-- you're about to learn much about my kin: mainly that they're gun toting psychos with a firm grasp of the redneck vernacular.
Yes. That's my granny in a wheelchair and cammo shooting an MP40 (though is it? Perhaps it's a downgraded model?). A few questions might come to mind. Namely, why give a senile old woman a fully automatic firearm and why in god's name would anyone-- especially someone who obviously lives square in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere and would be better off with some sort of long-range rifle for the impending commie-bastard invasion-- even OWN a military SMG?! The answer, my friends, for both questions is quite simple: because it's unbearably COOL (she really should've been wearing a bad-ass set of shades too. That would complete the geriatric assasin look she so obviously favors).
--HK_Newbie
Yes. That's my granny in a wheelchair and cammo shooting an MP40 (though is it? Perhaps it's a downgraded model?). A few questions might come to mind. Namely, why give a senile old woman a fully automatic firearm and why in god's name would anyone-- especially someone who obviously lives square in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere and would be better off with some sort of long-range rifle for the impending commie-bastard invasion-- even OWN a military SMG?! The answer, my friends, for both questions is quite simple: because it's unbearably COOL (she really should've been wearing a bad-ass set of shades too. That would complete the geriatric assasin look she so obviously favors).
--HK_Newbie
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
11:13 PM - HK_Newbie Goes Clubbin', skydiving, and bullet dodging
Hello there!
I realize it's been a while since my last post, so allow me to bring everyone up to speed on the telemundo special that is Newbie's attempt at an interesting life.
1. The Dangers of Being Accountable
Due to my forcibly enhanced status as Chief Digital Janitor for a failed coup de'tat in New Mexico, I still have Account Reps from different ISP's and IT consultancy firms calling my cell, knocking on my door (while wearing gold chains and holstered sidearms), and generally trying to assasinate my ass for, in their words, "making promises and failing to keep them". BULLSHIT BITCHES!!! There's only a few lucky ladies in the world who can actually make that claim, and none of them is named "Nancy from AT&T".
Trust me, I feel your pain. You did drag miles of fibre optic cable out into the middle of nowhere cause I thought it would be "neat" to have an OC12 circuit between sites. However, I never signed any contract, or gave any verbal go ahead to do such a thing. I just mentioned how FUCKING COOL it would be. If I got on a tangent about robotic ninja sushi chefs, would you open a restaraunt based on that premise too? Then proceed to sue me if it failed? (though i'm sure it would NOT fail. robot+ninja+sushi=always a winning combo!)
It's a sad sad world when people think HK_Newbie knows what he's talking about.
2. One of many clubbing experiences
Those who know me well enough know of my sojourns down to Baltimore's inner harbor in order to indulge in the carnal delights of the midnight till 1 crowd (or as I call it, the easy bootie hour). And it was a time for the simple acquisition of so-called "bootie". Unfortunately, the particular club/bar I went to was an "18 to enter, 21 to drink" establishment. Oh god! Am I actually that old?! These kids looked like they just stepped out of a middle school pep rally.
What was my solution to this apparent moral dillema? Many, many shots. Gradually the dillema went away on its own. Thank god for alcohol induced moral relativism.
I don't even remember this image, but it took place sometime after I safely arrived at my buddy's apartment. YAY for designated drivers! (Oh, and sober even, I can't make an appropriate "West-side" hand symbol without using both hands to intertwine the middle finger around the...finger between the pinky and the middle...what the fuck IS that finger called anyhow? I don't think I even use it!)
3. Skydiving
I went skydiving. I loved it. The people who jumped 15 minutes later...they didn't like it quite so much.
4. Bullet-dodging in Philly
Ummm...this is a story I may or may not tell. Only time will tell.
--HK_Newbie
I realize it's been a while since my last post, so allow me to bring everyone up to speed on the telemundo special that is Newbie's attempt at an interesting life.
1. The Dangers of Being Accountable
Due to my forcibly enhanced status as Chief Digital Janitor for a failed coup de'tat in New Mexico, I still have Account Reps from different ISP's and IT consultancy firms calling my cell, knocking on my door (while wearing gold chains and holstered sidearms), and generally trying to assasinate my ass for, in their words, "making promises and failing to keep them". BULLSHIT BITCHES!!! There's only a few lucky ladies in the world who can actually make that claim, and none of them is named "Nancy from AT&T".
Trust me, I feel your pain. You did drag miles of fibre optic cable out into the middle of nowhere cause I thought it would be "neat" to have an OC12 circuit between sites. However, I never signed any contract, or gave any verbal go ahead to do such a thing. I just mentioned how FUCKING COOL it would be. If I got on a tangent about robotic ninja sushi chefs, would you open a restaraunt based on that premise too? Then proceed to sue me if it failed? (though i'm sure it would NOT fail. robot+ninja+sushi=always a winning combo!)
It's a sad sad world when people think HK_Newbie knows what he's talking about.
2. One of many clubbing experiences
Those who know me well enough know of my sojourns down to Baltimore's inner harbor in order to indulge in the carnal delights of the midnight till 1 crowd (or as I call it, the easy bootie hour). And it was a time for the simple acquisition of so-called "bootie". Unfortunately, the particular club/bar I went to was an "18 to enter, 21 to drink" establishment. Oh god! Am I actually that old?! These kids looked like they just stepped out of a middle school pep rally.
What was my solution to this apparent moral dillema? Many, many shots. Gradually the dillema went away on its own. Thank god for alcohol induced moral relativism.
I don't even remember this image, but it took place sometime after I safely arrived at my buddy's apartment. YAY for designated drivers! (Oh, and sober even, I can't make an appropriate "West-side" hand symbol without using both hands to intertwine the middle finger around the...finger between the pinky and the middle...what the fuck IS that finger called anyhow? I don't think I even use it!)3. Skydiving
I went skydiving. I loved it. The people who jumped 15 minutes later...they didn't like it quite so much.
4. Bullet-dodging in Philly
Ummm...this is a story I may or may not tell. Only time will tell.
--HK_Newbie
© hk_newbie----Everything here is copyright of the losers that wrote it, by virtue of them writing it----