Saturday, August 19, 2006
10:22 PM - Review of The Deftones "Hole In The Earth".
The first single off of the new
Deftones album (
Saturday Night Wrist), entitled "
Hole In The Earth", is a plush landscape of sonic interplay. According to frontman
Chino Moreno, the song addresses the fissure that formed between himself and his bandmates during his time spent with side-project
Team Sleep. In it he describes his agoraphobic tendencies, how he wanted to just dig a hole and disappear from the world around him ("
...I hate all of my friends...They are the terror outside..."). Luckily for us, the chasm appears to have been therapeutic and the ambiance of the track gives an air of resolve and hopefulness. Simply put, the band has never sounded as cohesive as they do here. Musically, "
Hole In The Earth"'s spacey guitars and driving rhythm is reminiscent of the more uptempo offerings of
Failure and
30 Seconds To Mars or their own tracks "
Good Morning Beautiful" and "
Feiticeira". As usual,
Chino's vocal delivery is clearly influenced by his own auditory champions,
Robert Smith (
The Cure) and
Stephen Morissey (
The Smiths), with his soft-hearted swagger and his vibrant use of wails and moans. "
Hole In The Earth" is a top-notch debut for
The Deftones' upcoming opus and will easily garner them as much success, if not more, as "
Change (In The House Of Flies)" and "
Minerva" did. If this first taste is anything to go by, "
Saturday Night Wrist" will be another must have for any appreciative of intelligent and aggressive music.
(5/5)
"
Saturday Night Wrist" is due out on Halloween through
Maverick Records.
Deftones' MySpace-RaiNny
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
3:28 PM - actually...
I LOVE CROCS!!To Rainny:
3:06 PM - Super Secret Video of Calamity in the Philippines!!!
I've just uncovered this super secret video of
JANE from her sexcapade in her island country from last Summer.
Witness her Crocodile Tears!
Shortly after, she boned the large black man and Magneto came over and tore down some bridges and shit.
-RaiNny
Monday, August 14, 2006
1:12 AM - poll time!!!
well, it's THAT time...POLL TIME!!!
poll question: Have you ever had to use a plunger before?
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So last night, guess what! I used a plunger for the first time in my 20+ years of using a toilet. This is how it happened:
First I have to inform all of you that it IS normal for a female NOT to eliminate bowels everyday. I thought I was some freak for the longest time...though I still think that normal people should poo everyday...I am comforted by the fact that my professor believed this to be true and right enough to say this to a class of 64 AND the 53 females (minus me) agreed!!! Then she went on to make fun of the 10 men in the class who were all grossed out. What a relief!
So I went to take my every-two-days-poo last night (and "haha!" to those of you who were talking to me online last night because I WAS ALSO ON THE TOILET...i don't think i'm going to do that ever again though...just trying it out) and I guess I clogged the toilet. I have never done that EVER and I have to say that I didn't think THIS would be the bowel that would do it.
I tried to stay calm. The roommate was asleep. I brushed my teeth and washed my face before tackling this new situation.
I flushed the toilet again.
Thankfully the tank only holds enough to fill the bowl and not overflow. So now I've got water, bowels and toilet paper floating around. Boy, this was a certifiable disaster. Eventually, it went down a little. So I decided to take a bucket and just throw water into the toilet...this works when I'm cleaning the toilet and I want to scrub the bowl with a very low water level.
This didn't work.
So guess what I did next. I got a plastic bag...ohkay, TWO plastic bags and put my hand in it and grabbed some toilet paper that was floating in the water. And then I flushed again. Still no luck and now I had to go outside and put this in the garbage on the curb. Good thing it was garbage day today.
While I contemplated what to do next, I checked out my poo!! It might come as a surprise to you but I've never really looked at my bowels as closely as I did last night. There were beans in it!!! I didn't think it would be so easy to distinguish!! Are you as excited as I am right now?
Well, now we're at the part when I realized I'm going to have to use a plunger. So first, I googled "how to use a plunger" so I would know what to expect. And then I took the plunger out of the closet and there you have it...I cleared the toilet!! And I realized I'm pretty damn good at that. I'm pretty proud of myself.
It was quite an adventure and I'm glad that 4MR is around to have heard about it. May this go down in 4MR history as THE NIGHT THAT CALAMITY JANE LEARNED TO USE A PLUNGER!!!!
-calamityJane
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
10:22 AM - Newbie goes Drinking
"How have you been spending your time, Newbie?" I was recently asked by a viscous, blood-sucking succubus I used to date. Her apparent show of concern was like a bright ray of light, cutting through the overcast sky and illuminating the darkest corners of my soul. Before I replied, she quipped "I'm surprised you haven't killed yourself yet!"
"Ah, that's more like it" I thought to myself; a direct attempt at destroying me. Much more understandable than the pseudo concern.
"No, I was going to save that pleasure for you. Bitch."
And so I went drinking.
Unsurprisingly, random stuff happened during the course of that night and following day. I vaguely remember talking to people and dancing with people during the night, but to be honest, it was too much of a blur to recall accurately. So instead, I'll detail what I like to call: "My Wegmans Trip From Hell".
I was staring at some of the fresh-made, gourmet hoagies that Wegmans (or weggies, as I affectionately put it) is known for when I realized someone was laughing at me. Not just any sort of laughter, but malicious, cruel, and hateful laughter. I turned around and found this strange looking middle-aged lady pointing at me and laughing. She stopped for a brief second when I looked at her, but quickly resumed the pointing and laughing. I did a quick inventory of potentially laugh-at-able things; fly, up; face, intact (relatively); no toilet paper or vomit on my person; WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BITCH LAUGHING AT?
I determined that she was probably going to reveal her true form shortly (everyone knows that the villain's lengthy laughter immediately precedes some drastic metamorphosis usually involving spikey appendages and pointy tails)and I should probably bug the hell out of there before she devoured me whole.
Then I met another bitch at the checkout counter. She mumbled something to me as she took my payment and then looked at me like I had a third eye. "WELL?!" She practically screamed, "Are you going upstairs or leaving?!"
"Ummmmm...upstairs?" I guessed.
"Good." She sheathed her combat knife and handed me my change.
Lesson learned: Women are TERRIFYING
© hk_newbie----Everything here is copyright of the losers that wrote it, by virtue of them writing it----